We didn't get much sleep last night. Here's why:
I do NOT like tornadoes. They scare me senseless. Earlier this week there was a tornado "watch" (meaning that weather is favorable for a tornado developing), and I was checking the internet every five minutes to see if a tornado had developed. They are so destructive and the one "safe" room in our house can barely fit two people standing. If I could go to a basement I'd feel better.
Last night Cooper woke up at 10 pm crying. It is the first time that the thunder has bothered him. Mercedes is usually the one who runs into my room. As I was sitting next to his bed, trying to calm him down, Brent informed us that there was a tornado WARNING in effect until 1:17 am. It's a good thing that he's so calm, because I reacted... big time. Immediately I was shooing the kids out of their beds and down the stairs. I mean, what if a tornado came and ripped the roof off? Then the power went out. Oh man. I think that having no way of knowing where the tornado was is what scared me the most. I sent Brent out to the garage to get our handy flashlight/radio (thanks mom!), but we didn't find any news about the weather. I eventually calmed down thanks to a family prayer.
When the power finally came back on around midnight I put the kids back in their beds, figuring that the worst was over. I was still too scared to put Lincoln back in his crib; he has three windows in his room and I couldn't get the image of him being sucked out of one of them out of my head. We kept him in the port-a-crib in our room. Yes, I do have a very vivid imagination. Yes, I do worry too much. Poor Brent. He married a crazy one.
Before I had children, I didn't worry too much about safety. I remember being scared of a tornado when I was six, but the sky was literally green, and I was mostly scared because my mom wouldn't come down into the basement. I was terrified of something happening to her. Until my first pregnancy, I drove too fast. I loved riding motorcycles. I actually wanted to sky dive and bungee jump. Now I can't be in a moving car without my seatbelt on. It's just not worth the risk. I have too much to lose.
Last night I didn't actually think that anything would happen to us, but the possibility terrified me. I mean, there are families torn apart by tragedies every day. I was thinking that the tornado was probably going to destroy someone's home, why not ours? Heavenly Father loves all of His children equally, so as I was praying for protection I was aware that it wasn't up to me. I don't think that I could handle anything without the gospel, because life as a parent is pretty scary.