independence day

Photograph by Lolli.

I have lots of thoughts bouncing around in my head. And lots of emotion in my heart.

Yesterday we got to go to Brent's brother's house in Nephi for dinner and fireworks. It was so much fun. My sis in-law Nietra's family were there too and we played games and the kids all ran around and jumped on the tramp and played in the dirt. Who could ask for anything more?

The kids and I were even given a special treat: Mercedes and Cooper were invited to spend the night. There is nothing as exciting to my kids as a cousins' slumber-party.

I'd forgotten how easy it is to get just one child ready for church (my lowest-maintenance one - the Linkster). It was a heavenly morning for me. Quiet and calm and peaceful. But as we began to sing the opening hymn this morning, I suddenly felt like BARFING. Big time.

"What on earth is going on with me?" I thought.

I could tell that my stomach problems were "nerve"-related. My dad was on the other end of the pew holding Lincoln, with my mom between us. We were singing the Star Spangled Banner and I was fasting for Brent's safe return home this week. I was thinking of him standing in formation at a hot desert base in Afghanistan where some very mean people are continually showering him with rockets. I was thinking of how excited I am for us to be a complete family unit again, and of how very much I miss him. Then I thought of our first 4th of July together: fireworks at Thanksgiving Point and then our first kiss on my parents' front porch. Three months later we were sealed together by Elder Clayton in the Salt Lake Temple.



And now he's been gone for nine months. Sleeping every night in a far away place where people would love to kill him and his fellow soldiers. I realized why I suddenly FELT so much. Usually I have a Mercedes and a Cooper and a Lincoln distracting me. I don't have time to think of feel! It's nice to know that there's still a "me" inside of me, but I am very grateful that I've had three sweet and spicy children to tend to this past year. Focusing on them and their needs distracts me from mine. What a great blessing it is to be a mother!

After church Lincoln and I took a blissfully looooong nap, and then Sting and I drove down to Nephi to pick up the big kids. They were hitting and yelling at each other as I locked Coop into his car-seat, and I thought of how much I'd missed them! I was away from them for just long enough to not even be frustrated by their fighting. They both conked out as soon as we were on the freeway, and two sleeping kids, Sting and I drove home in peace.

On this Independence Day, I am thankful for my agency. I'm thankful that I have a loving Father in Heaven who listens to me, a Savior who understands me, and the Holy Ghost to comfort me. I am grateful that there are still citizens of this country who are willing to sacrifice their very lives in the name of FREEDOM. I am thankful for parents who love and take care of me and my children. I am thankful for a husband who "thirsts after righteousness" and is gentle and kind and always loving. I am thankful for family and friends who love me, warts and all.

handy manny

On Friday mornings (my mom's day off of work) she goes grocery shopping. This morning she took Mercedes and Cooper with her, while I worked very hard at packing (actually I slept in, and yes - I do feel guilty).

They returned home with a very excited Cooper carrying a (cheap) toy tool belt and safety helmet. He'd talked my mom into buying it for him, "for the drive to Washington." My mom's condition was that she'd wrap it as soon as they got home, and he could open it during our trip next week.

The thing is, Cooper doesn't honor conditions. He's a three-year-old. If he wants something, he always finds a way to get it. He must have the most grating whine. Ever. If you've heard it, you know what I'm talking about. He also likes to scream. And he's stubborn. Much more stubborn than me. He's what the professionals call, "a strong-willed child," something that will be an asset later in life.

Sleep is the only time that Coop is quiet.

So my first thought was, "yeah right. I bet he'll have that open within the half hour."

And he did.

See? It's a talent. He uses this to get what he wants.


Oh, Grandma tried her best. She let Cooper try to wrap it with her. She was so patient with him. But soon enough, he was locked in his room and had hidden the newest toy.

He uses this tool A LOT. We have a whole collection of these photos.

Grandma gave in. (I think that she lasted longer than I would have).

For the rest of the day, Cooper demanded to be called "Handy Manny." His helmet and tool belt were glued on to his person. When we ran errands and I called into the backseat, "how are you doing, Cooper?" His response was an immediate: "I'm NOT Cooper! I'm Handy Manny!!!"

He helped me to carry boxes into the UPS store. We then pretended that Target was a "warehouse" and spent a lot of time playing with Buzz, Thomas, Barbie, and dinosaurs. We picked out two new DS games for our extremely long drive to the great state of Washington.

I had a lot of fun; just me and the Coop.

Oh wait - I mean: just me and the Handy Manny.

By the way, he makes a super-cute Handy Manny.
Too bad my camera is already packed.

rocket attack

This morning Brent called (yay!!!). We were about three minutes into our conversation when I felt his attention waver.

"Brent? Are you listening to me?"

"Yeah. I'm just a little distracted because we're under a rocket attack, so now I'm on the floor."

"Does that happen often???" This was the first time (after 9 months) that I'd heard about these rocket attacks; he doesn't like to worry me.

Very calmly, he answered: "Yeah. Pretty much. We just have to get on the floor, and then I'll probably have to go pretty soon to report."

"Are you under the desk, at least?"

"No, I'm just on the floor."

Brent is SO the ying to my yang. I was actually much calmer than I'd normally be, since I was up so late last night (Lincoln decided he wanted to play at 1:30am).

Brent is calm.
I am hysterical.

He is mellow.
I am "high strung."

He goes with the flow.
I am a constant ball of stress and anxiety.

He is quiet.
I am LOUD (unfortunately, our kids take after me in that department).

Seven minutes later I was just beginning to explain the great pain I am in today (it's that time of the month, if you know what I mean). Brent's always great at being sensitive to my feelings and giving me the sympathy I'm looking for. I was waiting for him to say something like, "I'm sorry babe. You're so great to spend your day cleaning and packing." Instead I heard, "Well babe, that's the all clear - I've got to go report now. I lovelovelovelovelove you ."

Ten minutes of conversation was not enough for me, but at least I know that he's safe for now.

Eclipse

So.

I just saw Eclipse (the movie) and I have to say... it's so much better than I dared to hope.

Brent and I laughed through Twilight, and I sort of cringed through parts of New Moon (totally fake werewolves and a shirtless Edward).

But the latest installment of the Twilight Saga was, dare I say? Pretty darn good.

I think that the only time I really cringed was when (at least) 100 middle-aged housewives screamed because Jacob was shirtless. It happened a few times. That's what I get though, for going on opening night.

I don't know if there is another new director, but the acting, the timing, the cinematography... all much improved.

I'm actually looking forward to Breaking Dawn pt. 1. Anybody know when it's coming out?

tmi?

Tonight as I was changing Cooper's diaper,
he grabbed his you know what and said:

"Hi! I'm mister pee-pee!"

I couldn't help it. We all broke out in raucous laughter.

What kid doesn't love a laugh?

And so it continued:

Once his diaper was on, he grabbed his crotch and said,

"Hi! I'm mister diaper!"

Then, with his pajama pants on:

"Hi! I'm mister pants!"

And finally,

"Hi! I'm mister belly!"

"Goodnight mister belly."